It’s important to be aware that we all play different roles in our lives, similar to actors. This doesn’t mean we’re being fake; it’s just a part of how we interact with different people and situations. The way we behave as, for example, a parent, friend, or negotiator is influenced by the roles we take on. These roles can become so ingrained that we may not even realize we’re switching between them based on who we’re with or what we’re trying to achieve. The roles we play have a big impact on our relationships, success, and our overall reality.
Taking the time to examine the roles we play can lead to positive changes in how we lead and interact with others. We should consider whether the roles we’re taking on are effective and suitable for each situation. For example, are we acting like the leader the current situation requires, or the type of leader we want to be? As Kurt Vonnegut once noted, “We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.” In essence, the roles we play influence our behavior, and our behavior shapes our reality and even our biology.
The Impact of Role-Playing on Behavior and Biology
In 1981, Harvard psychologist Ellen Langer conducted an experiment to see how actual role-playing affects psychology, behavior, and biology. The results were surprising and almost unbelievable. In the experiment, Langer and her team re-designed the interior of a building to look like 1959. The rooms were complete with vintage furniture, newspapers, magazines, and a black-and-white TV. Participants felt as if they were transported into the past. The participants, all men over 70 years old, would live in the building for one week. During that time, they were asked to act as they did in 1959. In other words, they would take on the roles of their younger selves.
The participants were instructed to only talk about issues relevant to 1959 (including their personal lives) and act like they did 22 years ago. Anything beyond this year hadn’t yet happened in their lives. During the following week, the participants read old magazines and chatted about the news from 1959 as if they were just occurring now. They referred to their lives, friends, and families as they had never lived a day beyond their 1959 version of themselves.
Several of the participants had arrived with walking canes and mobility problems. However, the volunteers supervising the experiment were told that they could not assist the men with taking their bags upstairs or any other special treatment that might be provided to a frail person in their 70s. Because in this experiment, the men were now 20 years younger. The participants were required to act as if they had stepped into a time machine, which included taking on the physical demands of their younger selves. These conditions forced them to adapt to these new (“old”) conditions.
The ultimate objective of this experiment was not to recreate an enjoyable trip down memory lane for the participants but to create the conditions that trigger the body to exhibit the energy and biological responses of the participants’ younger selves. By the end of the experiment, several participants exhibited remarkable transformations observed, including better eyesight, memory, appetite, hearing, and even dexterity. Participants who had entered the experiment using canes and other assistance left without aid, carrying their luggage.
Langer and her team concluded that by expecting the participants to function independently (rather than as fragile “old men”), they were provided the opportunity to see themselves differently. By assuming a different role, the participants were able to impact their biology significantly. This experiment demonstrates that we can reinvent ourselves by intentionally choosing the role that we wish to adopt. As leaders, it’s essential to choose the role we want and to set the conditions and environment to support that role.
Choosing and Creating Your Role
By intentionally selecting our role, we affect our behavior; over time, those behaviors become habits, and those habits become who we are. We often think that change needs to be a long and drawn-out process. But as the Langer experiment reveals, when we’re intentional in our behavior, and we create the right conditions to support it, we have the power to change not just our role but even our biology. If frail seniors could experience such sweeping changes to their biology after just a week of pretending they were 22 years younger, imagine what we could change over a year?
For nonprofit leaders, this insight is transformative. The roles you unconsciously play could be shaping your organization’s culture, effectiveness, and impact more than you realize. Here are some steps to help you become aware of the roles you play and intentionally choose the ones that will best serve your mission:
- Self-Reflection and Awareness
Start by reflecting on the roles you play in different situations. Are you the visionary leader, the empathetic listener, the strict taskmaster, or the diplomatic mediator? Recognize that you might be switching roles based on context, which is natural, but important to acknowledge.
- Assess Effectiveness
Consider whether the roles you play are effective for your situations. Are they helping you achieve your goals, or are they holding you back? For example, if you’re always playing the role of an empathetic listener, you might struggle with making tough decisions or enforcing accountability.
- Intentional Role Selection
Choose the roles that align with your desired outcomes. If your organization needs innovation, adopt the role of a visionary and risk-taker. If it needs stability, become the steadfast and dependable leader. Be mindful of the roles you choose and their impact on your behavior and decisions.
- Create Supporting Conditions
Just as the Langer experiment created a 1959 environment to support the participants’ roles, create an environment that supports your desired role. This might involve changing your routines, surroundings, or even the way you interact with your team. Surround yourself with cues that reinforce the behaviors you want to embody.
- Encourage Role Flexibility in Your Team
Help your team members become aware of their roles and encourage them to adopt roles that best suit their tasks and challenges. This can lead to a more dynamic and adaptable organization.
- Monitor and Adjust
Regularly assess the effectiveness of the roles you’re playing. Be open to feedback and willing to adjust your role as needed. Flexibility and adaptability are key to effective leadership.
Nonprofit leaders have a unique responsibility to lead with purpose and authenticity. By becoming aware of the unconscious roles you play and intentionally choosing roles that align with your mission and goals, you can transform your leadership and your organization. Remember, as Kurt Vonnegut wisely said, “We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.” Choose your roles wisely, create the conditions to support them, and watch as your intentional behavior transforms your reality and the reality of those you lead.
Are you ready for more?
Exploring these resources will give you a deeper understanding of intentional and authentic leadership if you’re looking to upgrade your intentional and authentic leadership. By integrating the insights and practices from these books, articles, courses, and talks, you’ll develop a more purposeful, genuine approach to your work.
The Fifth Discipline: The Art & Practice of The Learning Organization
by Peter M. Senge
Senge’s work on creating learning organizations is vital for leaders looking to cultivate an environment of continuous improvement and innovation.
by Frederic Laloux
Laloux presents a model for organizations with high trust, autonomy, and purpose, providing case studies and practical guidance.
Discovering Your Authentic Leadership
by Bill George, Peter Sims, Andrew N. McLean, and Diana Mayer
Harvard Business Review article that provides insights into how leaders can develop authenticity through self-awareness and experience.
by Marcus Buckingham
Harvard Business Review article discusses effective leaders’ key behaviors and practices.
by Herminia Ibarra
This Harvard Business Review article explores the challenges of maintaining authenticity while growing and adapting as a leader.
How Great Leaders Inspire Action
by Simon Sinek
Sinek’s iconic TED Talk on the importance of starting with “why” and how it inspires others to take action.
by Brené Brown
Brown’s talk on the importance of vulnerability in building connection and trust, essential components of authentic leadership.
What It Takes to Be a Great Leader
by Roselinde Torres
Torres shares her research on the characteristics and behaviors of successful leaders in the modern world.
